Coffee With The Sarge: A Conversation With Army Veteran Sergeant Brennan & Mrs. Tougias

Yesterday, I had the honor of sitting down for a socially-distanced coffee in celebration of Veteran's Day with Veteran Army Sergeant Brennan Tougias and his wife Natasha Tougias, a highly skilled and passionate Recruiter at one of Boston’s leading Tech companies.

Nicole: Firstly, Brennan, I’d like to thank you, and all of our Veterans past and present for their service. To our Queer and BIPOC veterans, we thank you as well. Our flag waves because you never wavered, and I know this Blog wouldn’t exist today without you defending our right to free speech. For this, we will be forever grateful.

Brennan and Natasha, thank you so much for sitting down with me. As you both know, I’m working on learning more about military service, so I really appreciate you having some coffee with me.

So Brennan, What do you remember about the day you enlisted?

Brennan: I remember I was honored to serve my country.

Nicole: How did you choose your branch of service?

Brennan: My father was in the same branch so I figured I would do the same.

Nicole: Was your experience in the service similar or different to what you thought it would be?

Brennan: It was actually exactly what I thought it would be. I was well prepared because I had support from family who had similar experiences.

Nicole: What did you learn about yourself during your time in the service?

Brennan: I learned that I was able to push myself to my limits. I learned a lot about land navigation; I trained in warm temperatures, and even jumped out of planes!

Nicole: Wow- that sounds incredible. I’m sure it feels like you can face pretty much anything after those experiences. Did you learn anything about your fellow man?

Brennan: The military is an extremely diverse organization. I’ve met people from all walks of life which made us stronger as a unit.

Nicole: Is there anything you wish civilians understood about military service?

Brennan: Everyone has different experiences, but the military was a great organization for me. Leadership skills and working in a group dynamic are some things I have taken into my business career. You get a basic set of life skills and the opportunity for a free education after you serve your country.

Nicole: Speaking about careers in business, Natasha, Do you have any advice for Veterans who’re on the job hunt?

Natasha: Be thoughtful about the way you describe your military experience on your resume so that prospective employers can see how applicable your military skills are to a civilian career. Also, focus on leadership roles you were tasked with or chosen for.

Nicole: You’ve touched on one of the many skills our Vets offer when they leave the service. The unemployment rate for Veterans in the US is at 12% right now, which is crazy to me because we know that Veterans and military service members offer a skillset and discipline that many civilians don’t have. What’re some things that businesses can do to access this incredible pool of talent?

Natasha: A great place to start would be for companies to consider hiring people with background knowledge about the military so that hiring managers and recruiters could find veterans with applicable and/or easily transferable skills, since most civilians don’t know what military jobs entail. Some companies do a better job at advocating or have an established Vet Employee Resource Group (ERG) than others.

Some other ways businesses can support Veterans is to work with hiring managers to identify targeted positions for which Vets would have transferable skills. There are also a lot of local resources to work with your company on improving Veterans’ experiences. I would contact organizations like local V.E.R. (Veteran Employment Resource) and Hire Heroes.

Nicole: What’re some things businesses can do to support their Veteran employees in their career advancement?

Natasha: I think Veteran status should help someone get a leg up in terms of being entered into the interviewing process, but once in a company, everything should be merit-based. They could also offer some sort of program or opportunity for their veterans to receive training that will help them transition their military skills to a corporate environment.

Nicole: You’ve offered some great ways for companies to be supportive of our Vets. Can you tell me some of the things you’ve learned about supporting Veterans at home while being the spouse of a Vet?

Natasha: That it is very appreciated when people remember that military spouses sacrifice a lot too and therefore may need a little extra support, emotional or otherwise, from their community when their soldier is deployed.

Nicole: Do you have any advice for other Military couples?

Natasha: Have open, honest communication and realize that it’s a team effort and commitment, not one only shouldered by the soldier or their spouse.

Nicole: That’s such a great bit of advice, Tash. I’m actually curious- Brennan’s family have been serving in the Army for generations. Can you tell me a little bit about marrying into a military family? Is it any different than living with a civilian family?

Natasha: If you ask my husband we are just a regular family and have never considered ourselves a military family.

Nicole: What’re some habits that Brennan picked up in his Military service that you like? Any that you dislike?

Natasha: I think all the habits he picked up from the Army are amazing! They include loyalty, courage, selflessness, sacrifice, camaraderie, dedication, hard work, and drive. The only habits I’m not thrilled with are how fast he still sometimes eats and how precisely he likes things to be folded!

Nicole: Hah! Brennan- will you teach me to fold a fitted sheet?

Brennan: Haha sure! It’s definitely a helpful life skill.

Nicole: Do either of you have any advice for someone who is transitioning out of the service?

Natasha: Connect with other veterans through online groups or LinkedIn and see if they have any connections in an industry you’re interested in.

Brennan: Ask for their advice! Say yes to any networking opportunity you get because a lot of civilians are interested in hearing about a veteran’s experience.

Nicole: What do you want Elias and your nieces and nephews to know about military service?

Brennan: That people do this job so that Americans have the luxury of not having to experience wars being fought on our own soil.

Nicole: How can civilians support Veterans in their communities?

Brennan: At the end of the day Veteran’s serve because we love our country, and we want to be treated just like anyone else, but I would encourage you to look at organizations like Hire Heroes or Disabled American Veterans to learn more about how you can donate your time or resources to Vets who need it.

Nicole: So Brennan, What’s your ideal way to spend Veteran’s Day?

Brennan: Spending time with my beautiful wife and son. And that’s just what I’m going to do later today.